Know your emotions
The total number of emotions which we are able to recognize probably has a lot to do with our culture; and artistic attempts to portray them can become almost as varied and complex as life itself. , American Psychiatric Association emphasizes four major emotions which give us the most trouble: anger, fear, anxiety, and depression
Recognize that emotions
Don’t just appear mysteriously out of nowhere. Ask yourself throughout the day: “How am I feeling right now?” If you can, keep a journal. When you feel depressed, stop and notice the situation that produced it. Rate your mood on a scale from 1-100, with 1 being the least intense and 100 being the most intense that you are able to feel.
Keep Up-to-date Your Mind
Notice what was going through your mind at the time. Suppose you suddenly find yourself feeling 50% depressed. Stop and analyze what you were thinking about, until you find the “automatic thought” that was the cause of your depression. Your boss may not have made eye contact with you at lunch, for example; and without even being aware of it, the thought may have been in the back of your mind, ” He’s getting ready to fire me!”
The Depression LISTING
Write down the evidence which supports the automatic thought that produced the depression. For example, you may have let slip something that you should not have said which angered him, but which it is too late to retract.
Figure out the evidence
Write down the evidence that is against the automatic thought. When you begin to think about it, you might realize that since nobody gets along well with this particular boss, he can’t afford to actually fire anyone, because the department is too short-staffed.
Rating & Understanding the Situations
Ask yourself, “What is another way to look at the situation that is more rational and more balanced than the way I was looking at it before?” Taking this new evidence into account, you may conclude that your job is safe, regardless of your boss’s petty annoyances. , You still may not like your job or your boss, and you may want to look for another job. But at least you can take the time to find a good one — and you won’t have to worry about losing your house!
Mood Rating Method
Rate you mood now, on a scale of 1-100, and see how much better you feel. You not only have a new set of beliefs which are less likely to lead to depression, you also have an action plan which will permanently change your mood by changing your work setting. (That’s the behavioral therapy part.)
Sense of Perfection
I must be perfect in all respects in order to be worthwhile. Nobody can be perfect in everything that we have to do in life. But if you believe that you’re a failure unless you are perfect in every way, you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of unhappiness.
Don’t BE Over Expected
I must be loved and approved of by everyone who is important to me. Sometimes you just can’t help making enemies, and there are people in the world who bear ill will to almost everyone. But you can’t make your own life miserable by trying to please them.
Most of the people who treat you unfairly have friends and family who love them. People are mixtures of good and bad.
Frustration, Treating badly & rejection
Some people have a such a short fuse, that they are constantly losing jobs or endangering friendships because they are unable to endure the slightest frustration.
Worrying can solve everything?
Many people believe that” the work of worrying” will help to make problems go away.” Okay, that’s over. Now, what’s the next thing on the list that I have to worry about?
Everything is good or bad, with nothing in between. If you aren’t perfect, then you’re a failure.
You assume that your negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things really are: ” I feel it, therefore it must be true.”
What should & What Not
You beat up on yourself as a way of getting motivated to do something. You “should” do this, you “must” do this, and you “ought” to do this, and so on. This doesn’t make you want to do it; it only makes you feel guilty. When you direct should statements toward others, you feel anger, frustration, and resentment.
Avoid Accidental Issues
If you are feeling suicidal, don’t wait to seek help. Call your nearest suicide hotline or crisis hotline immediately and if one is not available, telephone your local police department!
Why Control is Important
It is important to control your emotions, but suppressing them or denying that they exist is entirely different. Suppressing your emotions can cause physical disorders and more emotional symptoms.
When life causes pain just be relaxed & don’t worry, things will get better. You’ve just got to concentrate and focus on your goal. You need to stop worrying. You have to love yourself before he will love you.
If necessary, set up the people around you and remove yourself from the situation.
Find a safe space
Anywhere that you can be alone. Please don’t care if it’s the bathroom, your basement, a closet, your car, your boiler room. Find somewhere that you can be alone with yourself, your thoughts and your feelings.
Listen to Yourself
Close your eyes and take five deep breaths in through your nose out through your mouth. Then ask yourself, why am I so upset? , Then answer yourself. Out loud, if you have to. Please believe that you have all the answers you need. , You know why you are upset, you just feel like you can’t do anything about it, so you’d rather ignore it.
Tap, tap, tap
Find the spot on your left hand, directly below your little finger, the fleshy part of your hand that you would chop a board with in karate. , With your index finger and middle finger of your right hand start to tap that spot on your left hand at a medium speed. You don’t need to tap that hard, only as hard as you would tap to make a sound on a drum. Let your fingers lightly bounce off the spot as you tap.
Know Yourself First
If you can be able to know your each & every movement of life then it’s easy to gain control over your emotions at any time
Decide a Thought in your mind
You decide which thoughts you allow to enter your mind. Most people think it’s the other way around – that human emotion just happens by accident. Negative emotions become their master. They never realize that they’re deciding to experience these miserable feelings. So it’s wrong
Emotions & its Physical Effects
When you experience negative human emotions like guilt, fear or anger, it creates a toxic response in your body. Many health issues are caused by thinking up negative emotions. This toxic response can manifest in ulcers, rashes, high blood pressure, nail biting, vague stomach pain, etc.
You CAN WIN
we all experience bad situations in life. Stressful situations are just a normal part of being here on earth. While you can’t control all the stuff that happens “out there”, you absolutely can and do control what happens in your mind. Nobody can help you unless you try it for
Who is the Main Role Player?
neither your situations (environment) nor your body (emotions) rule your mind. The reverse is true. Your brain is just sitting there nice and peaceful, waiting to be told whether it should remain calm and send peaceful signals to your body, or if it should send out alarm signals.
Be Observer your own mind
Negative thoughts are toxic and lead to your emotions of anxiety, guilt or hopelessness. However, through ” observance”, these thoughts can be told to leave your mind. , By learning to become the observer of your mind, you can watch your thoughts come in and then decide which ones stay and which ones must go.
Gain on Negative Thoughts
Try this the next time one of your negative thoughts pops into your mind. Catch it before it has a chance to turn into a negative human emotion that manifests in your body. Just notice it. Realize that you are its master and you can decide what to do with it.
Universal Truth of Psychology
Your mind doesn’t rule you unless you allow it to. You won’t be overrun by negative human emotions unless you allow this to happen. Become master of your thoughts and you in turn become master of your emotions.
Sing a Favorite Song
Think about something that requires concentration to distract yourself. Go over your “to do” list, sing a favorite song in your head or run through the multiplication tables. You won’t be able to dwell on what’s upsetting you at the same time.
Make a Smart Move
Take yourself out of the situation. If someone is pushing your buttons at the dinner table or if you see your ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend at a party, for example, excuse yourself to go to the bathroom or pretend you lost something and need to go look for it.
Cell Phone Problems
Fake an incoming phone call if someone is upsetting you. In the few minutes you pretend to talk to someone on your phone or leave the room to take the call, you’ll be able to get your emotions in control.
Count up to 20
Relax yourself with a few deep breathing exercises or by counting slowly to 20. Study a sign or landmark in the distance to calm your mind.
Control your Tears
Make up an excuse if you can’t control your tears. As long as you’re not sobbing uncontrollably, you can claim that your eyes are welling up because you twisted your ankle, stubbed your toe or got something in your eye, for instance.
Go For Opposite Directions
Call upon conflicting emotions to get another one under control. If you’re trying not to cry and express your anger, for example, make yourself laugh. If you’re trying not to laugh, think of something that makes you angry or sad.
Controlling vs. Managing
Right off the bat we can say that we’ve come to the realization that its better (and less frustrating) to MANAGE your emotions than it is to try to control them. , To manage is to handle or direct with a degree of skill. That’s one of the core competencies of Emotional Intelligence- your ability to manage your emotions and the emotions of others.
Fighting is not a Solution
If you are trying to suppress your emotions then you’re fighting against yourself. It’s not a solution where you might be getting annoyed more by yourself than the actual
Emotion has a positive intent
The reason that you want to look at it as managing your emotions is because all emotions have a positive intent. Look at this way. What if someone dropped something and you leaned over to help them pick it up? You didn’t notice that they were also leaning over. All of sudden-BAM! You bump heads. , Would you be mad at them? Would they be mad at you? No. Both of you might be mad because the both of you have headaches with Excedrin written on them! But c’mon now- you were only trying to help. Well, your emotions are only trying to help.
“I can do my job better than anyone,” “I can do a great job on that account,” “I can handle that advanced class.” Politicians are renown for saying only what they want to hear and repeating the same mantra over and over. They “stay on message. ” Craft YOUR message and stay on it.
Consciously relax all your muscles
Imagine that you’re being slowly dipped into warm water. Start with your feet and work up to the top of your head then out through your fingertips. Concentrate on keeping all muscles relaxed as you move up your body. Imagine that your forehead is cool to the touch.
Take several slow, deep breaths and concentrate on feeling calm and relaxed. Use those affirmations while you breathe.
Take a walk
Exercise of any sort will help you relieve stress and clear your mind. A clear mind is better able to control emotions
Get some fresh air and a little sunshine on your face. Getting out into nature can have a wonderful effect on our emotions. You are part of nature so getting out in it is just a natural act.
Visualize yourself remaining calm, succeeding and remaining in control
Imagine that you are able to handle this stressful situation just like the calmest person you know. Visualization is a strong tool that can help you achieve your goal of remaining composed and in control.
Phone a friend
Talking with a supportive friend will help you see things from a more neutral perspective. Everything is going to be okay.
Focus on right NOW
Don’t let a negative emotional reaction affect the outcome. Purpose to NOT allow that to happen anymore again
Use distraction tactics
Think of something that gives you pleasure. Re-live a wonderful time in your life where you could do no wrong and everything was right.
Take a hot shower or relax in a hot bath
Sometimes just being still and quiet can help you reduce stress. Practice your positive affirmations while soaking
Read something funny or watch a humorous TV show. Humor can make things seem more bearable.
Remember that there are always alternate outcomes. Over 90 percent of what you worry about never happens anyway and 9 of the other 10 percent of the time, things aren’t as bad as you imagined. Refuse to worry about when something is going to happen, instead decide on your course of action if it happens.
Regulation of emotions essentially means management of emotions off learning to work with them rather than give in to them. Emotions or feelings can often drive us to do things which are not healthy for us. However, by resisting temptation and impulsiveness we gain control over our emotions.
Self Regulation is a fine technique
Self-regulation is about managing feelings so that your behavior is appropriate for the circumstances. It is about not getting carried away by emotion at times of joy or disappointment. People who are good at self-regulation do not lose their perspective of the situation. Because of this they can usually bounce back even after failure.
DON’T DO TOO MUCH OVERCONTROL
People who over-control their emotions tend not to express their inner feelings. They may be too obsessed with the thought of appearing to be appropriate that they may miss out on enjoying the moment.
Using Emotional Rights
You know that you have the right to express whatever emotions of feelings you have at anyone anywhere. But you also must realize that you have the power to choose which emotion you want to use. This will definitely change your life in whatever way you want to.
Change the way of EXPRESS
Try reanalyzing why you want to feel this way for this circumstance. Is that really the best way to go about it? What will be the consequences if you use your emotions this way? Is there another route you can take to express yourself?
Learn to USE Emotional Intelligences
Emotional intelligence is also caring about how others feel without placing internal blame on yourself. It is not manipulative; it is validating. Emotional intelligence means that you recognize what you are feeling and can express those feelings without physical or verbal violence or manipulation.
One cannot control emotions. One can, however, control their behavioral response to their emotions. Emotions give us a clue as to how to behave; they are not commands. They signal a general response. , So, you shouldn’t strive to control your emotions, they can be very helpful. What you need to control is your behaviors.
Remember It Transforms
Remember that. Strong emotions also create strong MEMORIES. It’s something like transforming the emotions to bad memories, after you get crossed that situation it definitely will hurt whenever you again remember that in your mind, so it’s better to light your emotions don’t take it deeply into your mind
If you are feeling uncomfortable, LOVE and WARMTH will help in changing uncomfortable to comfortable.
If you are afraid, manufacture a sense of GRATITUDE. This will wipe out the emotion of fear
It is Tough to Deal With
It is crucial to control your emotions in order to live happy and fulfilling life. But many people find it difficult to control their emotions. In fact, they get controlled by their emotions instead of getting control over them. As a result, they are struggling to live happy and fulfilling life.
Motivational LIFE Quotes
When you are angry, you certainly want to use abusive and harsh words to the person in front of you. You may even come to blows and hit the other person. You certainly don’t want to do so but it was your anger that is making you do all these things. , It means you are in control of your emotions. At such a time reading quotes like this one ” If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.” Will definitely help you control your anger and manage your temper.
Presence is a beautiful thing, it is the realization that now is all there ever is. It is also described as living consciously, being aware of your emotions and reactions to things as they arise. , One great way to start becoming more present is through the use of meditation and I also recommend trying to be aware of being aware as often as possible.
Make your Choice
Now that you see it is possible to be truly present, observe your emotions and control them – which path are you going to take? You have the choice to look at any situation positively or negatively, some examples include: , , Negative: A close family member passed away, life sucks, what is the point , Positive: I’m thankful for knowing the person, and know they are at peace now , , Negative: I crashed my car, I’m going to have to pay a lot of money to get it fixed , Positive: It is a piece of metal, at least nobody was hurt and the situation can be resolved
Make A Decision That Control Is Possible
All behavioral changes start from one thing. The decision, acceptance and commitment in your mind that you want to make that change. In this case, self-control is possible albeit a long and gradual process. Only you can make the decision on how to control your emotions. , Remember that YOU hold the key to your own success as your behavior can threaten your career success. The idea is that you want to avoid extreme emotional responses for example in the case of anger – rage and hate.
Identify Your Action Signals
These action signals can be classified broadly into 10 types namely: ,
1. Discomfort ,
2. Emotional pain / Hurt ,
3. Anger ,
4. Disappointment ,
5. Inadequacy ,
6. Frustration ,
7. Fear ,
8. Overwhelmed ,
9. Guilt / Regret ,
10. Loneliness ,
When you experience one or more of these action signals, you should realize that they are sending you a specific message. To gain control of your emotions, you have to listen to these messages and take proper action.
Change the Attitudes
Re-think your attitudes about your circumstances-change your thoughts-and you will significantly change your feelings and emotions (at least enough to positively affect your daily life)
Practical steps for controlling your emotions
Based on the previous explanation we can summarize the following actions as methods of emotional control: , 1) controlling your self talk ,
2) whenever you have a certain emotion try to control it don’t allow it to grow because giving up to the emotion will only result in loss of control ,
3) Every time you practice emotional control it will become easier so train everyday ,
If you succeeded in controlling your emotions you will take more rational decisions, you will communicate with people in a more effective way and you will become happier. Lots of people know how to communicate effectively but they fail to do it because they lack the ability to control their emotions.
Instead of getting mad and yelling walk away and take deep breaths , Stay positive while doing so , Believe that it happened for a reason and solve it , Take control by controlling how you react
Power of WORDS
Negative emotions are related to power of words, in a fit of rage you may tell things which you don’t mean. This may also have a bad impact on your relations with family, friends, office colleagues & others as well. You should always try and stay in control in case of power of words
Grow your Personality
You may say something out of control but the other person may take it in a negative way. Controlling emotions in this case is really imperative you should always avoid these types of situation in your daily life. This is an important base of your personality traits
Changing moods are very much helpful to control over your emotions. If you are in state of depression, your emotions also act in the same manner. Try and get out of this state as early as possible
Drinking lots of water is a good way to rule out the negative emotions. It would also benefit you in terms of health. So, just pick up a glass of water and slowly gulp it down. You will surely feel relaxed!
Keep Running Behind
This is a very crucial key for you if you want to succeed. No matter in your career or in your life, success will never come automatically. You must never give up if you desire for success. If you insist, keep on your hard work, in the end, the wealth will be yours, prosperity will be yours. You must know that this is the spirit that you need to succeed in your life.
Be Prepared onto IT
You must always be prepared to strive, anytime! This is what you need if you want to be successful. Did you know that every morning, in Africa, a deer must always be prepared to run! Why? Because, if the deer is not prepared or run slower, it will become a lions breakfast. , Did you know that every morning when a lion wakes up, it must be prepared to run? Why? , Because if it is not prepared or run slower than the deer, it is not going to has any breakfast. So this is what is happening in the real world. You must always be prepared.
Be Responsible Always
This is a very great key. If you can take all the responsibility, then you wont blame anyone. You must know that this is your life, and if you want to succeed, you will have to walk this road on your own. Don’t give any excuses and don’t blame anyone if you fail.
Burning Desire Required
Again, this is a very important key that is going to help you open the door to your success. Without this key, it is almost impossible for you to achieve success. , In this world, who doesn’t want to be rich, who doesn’t want to be successful? Everyone wants success. , If you meet a beggar, just ask him whether if he wants to be successful. I bet, he’ll say yes. But then he will always remain as a beggar, why? Because he doesn’t have the burning desire to be successful!
Be On top of your WORK
You must be 100 percent concentrated in your business and your work. Focus in your goals until you achieve it. This is a key that you will need if you desire for success. For you, your business is the most important thing in your life. You don’t need to care what had happened to other businesses out there. It is your own business that is making you richer, not others. So always focus in your work.
I AM TALENTED
Now, this is another key you will require if you want to be successful. You need to believe that you are talented! You must have the confident to overcome every obstacle that you face in your journey to success. Scientists claim that we human only use approximately 10-15% of our brain in our life. And the rest, we never used it.
Think before you react
People often loss temper and make the wrong decisions or take adverse actions. You emotions tend to switch your bring off and you cannot think right. Think about the consequences your actions might have on your near future. Learn to analyze the whole situation before you react.
Change in pattern
The best way to overcome wrong emotions is to change your mental pattern and how you react to a specific situation. You can use thoughts that benefit and enrich your life, and those around you.
Increase your awareness of and look out for moments when you feel an irrational thought coming on. You need to focus all your attention on the sunny side of life to attract joyful emotional energies within yourself.